25.1.10

i miss this, and the this that should be here.

even though we were busy the whole time, i had a really hard weekend. i have felt that the past 2 weeks i was doing fairly well. it seemed that getting back in to the normal routine of life was not as taxing as i had expected and was glad that i was (seemingly) doing okay. then friday came. and saturday was harder. sunday we had lunch with the rainbolts and pooles, our friends who both had baby girls just two weeks after campbell was born. that was the hardest part. as lindsey and ashley sat nursing their little babies, i sat with empty arms.

so this morning, as jackson pleaded with me to show him "jack jack baby pitchas!", i cried. i was supposed to be putting bows on a little baby girl that would probably look something like her brother. 

i miss you sweet campbell. i cant wait for the day when i hear you call me "mommy".


3 comments:

  1. You are so unbelievably strong, Kathleen. I can't fathom having to deal with what you're going through. And never think there has to be a time limit on your grief.

    Praying for you, sister.

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  2. i love that picture of fat baby j.
    i love you, too.

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  3. BIG.FAT.HUG to you sweet thing.

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