touching my toes and other thoughts.

uhhhhh its been a weird week. oh right, its only wednesday. well on the growing a baby front, baby bro is kicking up a storm and feels like he is standing straight up inside of me. which is why suddenly i feel pregnant. like really pregnant where bending over to pick something up is a little harder, where by the end of the day your feet start to look a little swollen. where i NEED the foot rub. but ill tell you what, its worth it. so worth it.

jackson asked me last week when we were going to be a "real family wif other tids". i told we are a real family and he has his sister campbell in heaven and his brother will be here soon. that worked for him, but it kind of stirred something inside me. not an unhappiness (though i have my grumpy/complainy days) but something that started thinking about why he would see us that way, and blogging and how often it makes me feel ways about things and then i got real deep and i suddenly said out loud

"oh my gosh. people get paid PAID to blog about shiz they buy and stuff they like to look at."

i shared with jeffers when he got home. and then i went to south florida for the weekend with my MIL, SIL and aunt-in-law (and sarah, hi sarah!). and the place is dripping in money and people who are so absorbed in themselves and their shiz that i felt weird when we left.

so tonight jeffrey laid something huge on me and we have to talk it out but it seems like maybe its a challenge for us. and for us to live like we believe and we think. oi. its a lot.

all im saying is, im over humanity right now. (sounds so friendly right?!) mostly americans and materialism and all that jazz. and im sure there will be a sundress i want next week because i am freaking human but i want to keep reminding myself what matters. and thats people, who we were created to have relationships with in order to glorify our Creator.

and if you have read this whole thing, thanks. i didnt even have a picture to lure you in, how rude of me.